Wild Swim Climping - May 2019

I last took to the water back at the end of October 2018, in the slightly chilly waters of Devon.  This year's first swim happened later than I've ever swum before; I'm usually in sometime in April or at least the beginning of May, but for some reason this year, I just didn't get my act together.

It was a warm day, with a bustling breeze, and as is often the case, although inland there were clear blue skies, down on the south coast, there was a slight haze, as if someone was gently blowing smoke across the sun.  As usual, the beach was busier just by the car park, but a ten minute walk along the path and we had an entire stretch to ourselves.  The tide was out at it's furthest point and was on the turn. the beach stretched out before me like a lunar landscape, ripples of white sand trailing like dancing ribbons between the groynes. I took off my shoes and picked my way across the pebbles, then onto the sand, heading for the nearest tidal pool.  Warm and soft.  Hard, compact sand.  Gently the waves picked at my toes, scaling my foot with each successive roll.  Breathe.  Ions.  Happiness.

I lay on the sand for a while, just watching the waves curling in on themselves, the breeze creating a lace-edged trim as each wave hit the sand.  No putting it off any longer and worried that the cold water would defeat me, I just catapulted myself into the water, running into the ankle-high waves, and nearly tripping over, hopping and stuttering over unseen rocks beneath the surface.  It wasn't quite the elegant entrance I'd been dreaming of!!!  Moving along the beach I found a rock free patch and once I was knee high, I just dunked myself in.  It was cold, but not that breath holding, ouch inducing cold that usually marks my first swim of the year.  I struck out for the horizon, turning after a few strokes to look back at the beach.  Empty apart from a dog walker.  Lying on my back, my feet to the sky, I watched the light bounce and careen off the breaking waves.  Above, a lone seagull called and soared, curious as to what was happening below.  I can lie floating quite happily for some time, but the tips of my fingers began to go numb, so I struck out for the shore.  I'm always sad to walk away from a swim, the antidote of course, is to plan the next one.  The endorphin high from a wild open water swim is addictive.  The only cure is more of the same.

Reasons to be Cheerful...

Roses, being fearless and scents in the air

1.  My garden is suddenly bursting to life; the honeysuckle and clematis fighting for space and at night the unmistakeable sweet, sweet smell of my jasmine that hasn't flowered for the last two years...In amongst all the greenery a swathe of yellow climbing roses that nod their full-blown petals in delight.

2.  A child tells me that she wants to thank me for helping her not to be fearful of life.  What a joy and privilege.

3.  As I wander up the hill in the early evening light, the scents of the earth, released by a sudden downpour earlier, assail me.  I pick up hints of lavender, heady roses, box hedge and other sweet blossoms that I can't quite identify.  It makes the meeting I'm heading to, and slightly dreading, a little easier.

Being Mindful

Mindful: (adjective) attentive, always heedful

It's been a buzz word for a while now, mindfulness. I first came across the concept of 'mindfulness' a few years ago when I was looking for a way to relax and switch off; in the course of that search I took a meditation class with a wonderful Buddhist monk.  Amongst other things, he taught me to look at the moment; to stop looking ahead, or indeed behind and back, and to be completely focused on the moment; to pay attention to the now.  Sometimes easier said than done, but it's a practice that enhances the joy of the here and now.  I've been reminded of the need to be mindful in this past week as my family received some fairly devastating news and as I process and digest this news I'm trying not to race ahead, catastrophising and pre-empting a situation that may not arise.  Again easier said than done.  However, in the face of a situation that cannot be erased and with the future of someone I love so open to uncertainty, I find myself needing to be mindful.  Wanting to be mindful. Needing to remind myself that the only moment that counts is the now.  Not my fears for the future, but the pleasures of the present;  for each moment is just that - a gift, a present, and we should not dare to waste it. 

So, with this thought in mind, during the last few days I've been taking care to be present in the moment and to find happiness in the small things, the small moments;  sharing laughter and meals with close friends; the beauty of flowers growing in my garden; warm comforting baths.  For every moment that brings sadness, there is the equivalent moment of joy and pleasure.    These are some of the things that have given me pleasure in my more heedful moments this week:

{hydrangeas, a gift from a friend; sweet smelling roses from my garden}

{aromatherapy candle, just lighting it each night feels like a mindful moment}

"The truth is my love
that days of sadness will come,
but I’ll come through them."  

Haiku, Tyler Knott Gregson

What do you do when life hits you with a curve-ball?  How do you stay in the moment?  I'd love to hear...

Thinking Thankful Thoughts

It's easy in the busyness of life to forget how wonderful our lives really are most of the time; yeah it's stressful worrying about work, deadlines, children's health, paying bills and getting the washing done; but how about all those things we take for granted.  Here's some of the things I'm thankful for today:

 

being able to move around with ease (seriously, don't take this one for granted - I dread the day I can't run/ swim/go for a bike ride)

 

for my lovely home and treasured bits

 

for wonderful friends

 

for family I love, that love right back

 

for my new kitten Minxy and her soft trusting eyes

 

for enough pennies to pay for an indulgent manicure

 

for opportunities

 

for love 

 

 

What are you being thankful for today - let me know...

 

image source: here



Five things...making me happy

It's been a long, long week with a few not so good moments, but despite that there are the little things around me that still make me smile and realise how lucky I am...

I love this book, full of gorgeous photos, and the shells came from a beach in Dubai, the dome from Two Sisters in Wimbledon Village. 

Dutch Peonies, bravely withstanding the torrential rain.

Piles of vintage napkins and bedlinen, waiting patiently on the shelf.

This gorgeous light and airy (pink!) bedroom

Here's to a relaxing weekend for us all x

Happiness is...

The start of a new week; Monday; usually associated with feelings of gloom and general down-hearted expectations and I'm no exception, especially when I've just had a week off.  So, just to buck the trend a little and start the week off on a good note I'm thinking happy thoughts (we love you Pollyanna!).  I'm always drawn to things 'happy'; books promising you greater happiness in 10 days/12 months/3 hours etc - you get the drift!  I've covered this before here and I recently discovered the blog Simply Enough and a post about happiness that directed me to the True Happiness Test.  It takes about four minutes and I scored a pretty decent B+.  It recommended that I spend more time in nature, be sure to surround myself with positive people and take more exercise.  I wasn't sure about the positive people thing, as I thought I was quite ruthless about the company I keep, but when I thought about it I realised that I tend to absorb others' dramas so maybe I need to be mindful of that...

Anyway, enough rambling and onto the things that are currently making me happy.

A print from the Book of Hours that hung in my Granny's bedroom for many years.  I remember it arriving from MIDNAG as a child and being utterly captivated by it - the gold leaf and the beautiful people.  It seemed like a fairytale to me.  Now it hangs on my bedroom wall, and is often the first thing I see in the morning...

 These gorgeous flowers on the big table in MasterChef judge Greg Wallace's cafe Wallace & Co.  I went to meet a friend for tea and cakes and it didn't disappoint.  Light and airy with fabulous cakes and a relaxed vibe I think it's set to become a favourite afternoon haunt.  The takeaway salads were fab including a wonderful Panzanella Salad which just smells of summer.

My new work space, complete with Diptique candle which smells heavenly; a calm and inspiring place to write and work.

This gorgeous Silver Birch Tree that looks over our garden.  To be honest, it's taken me a while to make friends with this tree because as you can see it's pretty big.  In summer it tends to block out the sun late afternoon which I really resented; however, we've made friends now because after a bout of insomnia I used to go out into the garden at ridiculous hours (ie 5am!) and somehow it won me over - just rustling in the breeze, the wonderful limeness of its leaves and it's sturdyness.

NOTHING beats drying your washing on the line!  Especially after weeks of rain ... Watching my towels dry in the sunshine, flapping in the breeze, made me inordinately happy. Small things...

As I'm reminded daily by my framed 2011 New Year Resolutions, "Find joy in the small things". So true.

So, what's making you happy?  I'd love you to share...

Glimpses of the Weekend

"Rain, rain go away, come back another day"..and it did! It's been a lovely weekend, beginning and ending in sunshine...I've done some of my most favourite things this weekend which has been lovely - topping up the memory banks and recharging batteries, as I know the next two weeks are going to be horrendously busy.
Saturday was long and leisurely, late getting up, late going to bed and here's what I got up to:

A train ride into Richmond (along with hundreds - yes, literally - of people dressed up in 70s gear!!!)where I visited their Farmer's Market down by the riverside.  It's one of the best markets I've been to in West London, well-worth the effort of getting over there from Wimbledon.  The produce is just exceptional and there is a Lebanese food stall there that sells the most divine street food I've had.  This time we tried the flatbreads stuffed with aubergine, tomato and chilli and Lamb Burak's stuffed with lamb, coriander and potato; retiring to the grass down by the river to listen to the busker, eat and snooze for half-an hour in the sunshine. Bliss..

I bought some purple sprouting broccoli which I'm planning to steam and eat for breakfast with a poached egg..

Who needs the Trevi Fountain?!!!!
After a quick snooze it was off to the theatre (more of that later in the week) to see a wonderful production by Northern Stage and Live Theatre, before finishing off the day with dinner in one of my favourite restaurants; where the lovely waitress brought us complimentary apple liquers and as she put them down she smiled and said "this is because you didn't have any dessert, and because good energy attracts good things".  How right she is.  The perfect end to a really lovely day.
Sunday, dawned bright and fair again, so off to the Weald of Kent for lunch in a country pub

where the garden is left wild and rambling on the hillside, the old apple tree and the wild sweet-peas growing contentedly.  We finished off the day with a wonderful (but tiring!) walk up Box Hill and along the ridge that becomes the north downs before heading down to the valley bottom and walking through a wonderful meadow of grasses, buttercups, and dandelion clocks...

Views from the top of Box Hill across the Weald

Down in the valley the river, willows and grasses

and before I left I made a wish (or three!).  Wishing you all a wonderful week to come...x

Wild Geese

I've always loved this poem by Mary Oliver.  It somehow encapsulates loss, grief and hope by drawing on the eternal call of nature.  I'm going to give it to my friend, maybe it will help.

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting --
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

and here she is, reading it herself...

Do you know of any good poems/words/images that help with grief?

A Clean Slate

Happy New Year to all my readers! I wish you all health and happiness wherever you may be. Obviously a new year brings resolutions which some people hate but personally I love the blank canvas. I havent quite firmed up my new year resolutions but when I do I'll be sure to post them...what are your resolutions? Finally but most importantly I'd like to thank all my readers who follow me - from the UK, Russia, America, Germany, France and even as far afield as Indonesia! Thank you so much for all your support during last year - I couldn't blog without you and appreciate your comments greatly. I know 2012 will bring many good and wonderful things,so here's to a brand new year - I'm looking forward to sharing it all with you - cheers!

Holiday season

It's been a few days since I posted - guess we're all in the same boat here as it's just been so busy over the festive season - I hope everyone had a wonderful few days and managed to relax and enjoy time with family and friends in amongst all the madness?!  I have now escaped up north to Northumberland and am happily ensconsed in my sister's beautiful renovated priory farmhouse. The Priory was built for an Augstinian Cannoness and the Priory Nuns looked after the 'Lady Well' just up the fell.  St Paulinus (it is said!) baptised many hundreds of pagen celts in its tranquil waters; it does have a very peaceful feel to it - you can almost feel St Paulinus watching, it has a very definite spiritual atmosphere.    The view from the farmhouse window is just about as far from my view in London as it could get - here I look out onto fell and river, sheep and cattle.  We have just got back from a wild, wild walk over the fells, completely exhilarating and makes coming back to our log fire even more welcoming.  I feel as if I can finally sigh with relief and give up all my London cares and worries to the cleansing northern winds and relax into recharging my batteries ... I hope wherever you are, whatever you're doing, you are also winding down and having some 'me' time.

The meandering stream south

and north...

Lady's Well - Holystone Northumberland

Figure of St Paulinus

Beautiful lichen in the woods

and more of the same...

Give Thanks

When I was little I loved my birthday, but hated the days that came afterwards...Why?  Quite simply because my parents made me sit down and write my 'thank-you' letters.  It wasn't enough to just say 'Thank you for the elephant toothbrush holder', in fact the actual words 'thank you' weren't really allowed to appear.  Instead I had to eulogise about what each particular gift had done to enhance my world (this was especially difficult with an elephant toothbrush holder!!).  Each note had to be different and sincere...As I've mentioned before in this post, the art of letter writing is flagging but despite my indifference as a child, as an adult now I quite enjoy the time to sit down with my new 'thank you' cards and express my gratitude.  Here are some cards that I'm particularly liking at the moment:

Cupcake inspired

Francais

Vintage

Japanese Cherry Blossom

A brief thought

So true!!!  I've been thinking about all my old friends - especially Lizzie.  To all my friends near and far (Em in Oz!) Thank you all for the laughs, the shoulders (they've had a fair soaking over the years!), the straight talking, the lunches, where would we be without our oldest and dearest friends who stick with us through thick and thin...

Three beautiful things...

1. sleeping til late then just lying warm and cosy under the duvet reading.

2. lemon drizzle cake, moist with curd, soft and comforting with a cup of tea.

3. Geordie cat, lying with his head tucked into his soft fur belly, purring loudly.

Stolen Time

Bank holidays always feel to me like stolen days...as if the universe has given us some extra time and doesn't want paying back. If feels ok to lie later in bed, give the gym a miss, potter about in the kitchen and garden, chat to friends and reply to emails; it feels ok to read a chapter of my book whilst lying on my bed eating Minstrels (and it's 3 o'clock in the afternoon!)and to be planning a roast dinner followed by a long hot soak, with candles and face-pack, because before you know it tomorrow is here with its deadlines and do's and don'ts and today will be just another bar on the recharge battery of life.

"It is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes happiness."

"Let your life lightly dance on the edges of time like dew on the tip of a leaf. "

Monday 12 April 2010

Strange, quiet day today...
been for a swim, set up desk in bedroom so I can get some work done, although trying to make desk look less worklike to prevent stress setting in as I go to bed and see the computer winking at me in the darkness.
Read an obituary today about Elspeth Thompson and realised she had killed herself which, although I didn't know her, made me feel inexplicably sad. Especially as I've just read her book 'The Wonderful Weekend Book' which has made me feel totally inspired. How could someone who suggests we make a 'Gratutude Journal' find herself so unable to find anything in her life that makes her feel grateful enough to stay alive. Depression is a destructive companion, full of trickery and malice. I found this poem on her blog - here it is as a reminder that life can be full of blessings, if you only look closely enough

TWENTY BLESSINGS
adapted from the Celtic by Thomas A Clark

May the best hour of the day be yours.
May luck go with you from hill to sea.
May you stand against the prevailing wind.
May no forest intimidate you.
May you look out from your own eyes.
May near and far attend you.
May you bathe your face in the sun’s rays.
May you have milk, cream, substance.
May your actions be effective.
May your thoughts be affective.
May you will both the wild and the mild.
May you sing the lark from the sky.
May you place yourself in circumstance.
May you be surrounded by goldfinches.
May you pause among alders.
May your desire be infinite.
May what you touch be touched.
May the company be less for your leaving.
May you walk alone beneath the stars.
May your embers still glow in the morning.

And another
WILD GEESE
BY MARY OLIVER

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting —
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.